Avoiding the Laundry

My "Home" Song

2010-07-02T11:32:00.000-04:00

First off, here' are the lyrics and the Jason Mraz cover:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QHrJda73pNs&feature=related

"Summerbreeze" by Seals & Crofts

See the curtains hangin' in the window

In the evening on a Friday night
A little light-a-shinin' through the window
Lets me know every thing's all right

Summer breeze makes me feel fine
Blowin' through the jasmine in my mind
Summer breeze makes me feel fine
Blowin' though the jasmine in my mind

See the paper layin' on the sidewalk
A little music from the house next door
So I walk on up to the doorstep
Through the screen and across the floor

Summer breeze makes me feel fine
Blowin' through the jasmine in my mind
Summer breeze makes me feel fine
Blowin' through the jasmine in my mind

Sweet days of summer -- the jasmine's in bloom
July is dressed up and playing her tune
And I come home from a hard day's work
And you're waitin' there
Not a care in the world

See the smile awaitin' in the kitchen
Through cookin' and the plates for two
Feel the arms that reach out to hold me
In the evening when the day is through

Summer breeze makes me feel fine
Blowing through the jasmine in my mind
Summer breeze makes me feel fine
Blowing through the jasmine in my mind

I remember this song from my childhood, but that's not really when I fell in love it with.

It was on the second "Dazed & Confused" soundtrack. Did you know they had two? Well, they did and this song was on it. I'd say it was the mid to late 90's and I was in university. Joe, my then boyfriend/now husband, and I had already been together for at least 3 years. We knew we would get married it was just waiting out time until my schooling was all finished. (On an aside note, we got engaged on my last day of classes in '98. We didn't wait long, but at that point we had been together for 7 years.)

As much as this song reminds me of my childhood it also was my dream of what I wanted my home to be like. I knew I wanted a kitchen with a window over the sink so I could be at the counter working when Joe drove in the driveway from work. Old fashioned and cliche, but true. What can I say, I'm an old fashioned romantic.

Now I look at the song and realize that I pretty much got what I dreamt of. How lucky am I?

Summer Playlist Recommentations

2010-07-02T11:06:00.000-04:00

My good friend Tricia is making a summer playlist and wanted some recommendations and, well, I kinda went a little overboard. Then my other friend Nicole (no, she's not imaginary) said I should post my recommendations on my blog and I thought, "Why not?!".
So, here it is....my MANY recommendations for what could be included on a summer playlist.

These are songs I included in my "Summer 2009 Playlist". They're not specifically from last year, but ones that just make me think of summer:

Summertime - DJ Jazzy Jeff & the Fresh Prince (A must! I remember having the cassette single of this. "Drums please!". Luv it!)
You Get What you Give - New Radicals (This plays at the end of "Surf's Up", so my kids love it too.)
Into Yesterday - Sugar Ray (Again from the "Surf's Up" soundtrack, but I dare you to not think of summer when hearing it! "The sky turns to a different shade of blue after the rain.")
I'd Like To - Corrine Bailey Rae ("Put Your Records On" is a good song, but this is more summery.)
Make It Mine - Jason Mraz (Just light and fluffy.)
All This Beauty - The Weepies (Abby always likes this song. She bounces around to it.)
Flake - Jack Johnson (My favourite JJ song of all time, so it always has to be included.)
Seven Days in Sunny June - Jamiroquai (The title says it all.)
Summer Breeze - Jason Mraz (The original was my favourite "home" song, but I love this one just as much. I'll post another blog entry as to what I mean about "home" song. )
You Don't Have to Believe Me - Eric Hutchinson (If I have not introduced you to this man than shame on me!)
Time Won't Wait - Jamiroquai (Just fun!)
Mama Told Me (Not to Come) - Three Dog Night (I always remember Tom Jones singing this song on a TV special with a bunch of British celebrities in the audience.)
Free Ride - Edgar Winter (Mel Gibson, Robert Downey Jr - "Air America". My second summer of university.)
Doctor My Eyes - Jackson Browne (If I ever had the guts to do karaoke this would be one of my songs.)
Tiny Dancer - Elton John ("Almost Famous"....need I say more?)
Bad Things - Jace Everett (It's the theme song for "True Blood". It's also one hell of a nasty song and I love it!)
Use Somebody - Kings of Leon (More from last summer, but if you don't know them.....)

Okay here are songs from my Driving playlist from when we went to Florida this spring:

Alloway Grove - Paolo Nutini (I always picture dancing to this song with a drink in my hand. I'm always sad the entire world doesn't know this song.)
Crash Into Me - Dave Matthew's Band (Because I forgot how amazing this song is. Bad me!)
Don't Stop Me Now - Queen (Not a Queen song I knew of until I watched "Shaun of the Dead". Now I love it.)
Everyday - Dave Matthew's Band (I remember this video was a guy just going around hugging people. )
Everyday People - Sly & the Family Stone (This group always make me think of Nicole's family....or was that KC and the Sunshine Band? ;) )
Got to Get you Into my Life - The Beatles (Because every mix has to have some Beatles in it.)
Henrietta - The Fratellis (Julie introduced me to this group....just a fun song!)
I Could Break Your Heart Any Day of the Week - Mandy Moore (My other karaoke song.)
I Want the World to Know - Anjulie (I will admit to dancing in my kitchen to this song many times.)

(If You're Wondering if I Want you to) I Want You To - Weezer (I am embarrassed to say I did not know about this song until this year. Bad me. )
Joker and the Thief - Wolfmother ("The Hangover". The scene at the blackjack table. Picture Bradley Cooper giving the security camera the finger. Yes!)
Life Less Ordinary - Carbon Leaf (This was one of the sample songs on my computer. Luv it!)
Mushaboom - Feist (Okay it's more of a winter song, but I love the idea of it.)
Neverending Summer - Dayplayer (Nicole - Sweets from "Bones" is singing this song!!!!!)
Once in a Lifetime - Talking Heads (We all know this song, but who owns it. Get it!)
Oxford Comma - Vampire Weekend (Okay it does start out "Who give a fuck about an oxford coma", but the fuck is pretty fast. lol!)
Stay (Wasting Time) - Dave Matthew's Band (Fun.)
The Underdog - Spoon (Picture Zac Efron walking slowly to this song in "17 Again" and that's only half of the appeal. ;) )
Your My Best Friend - Queen (Summer!!!!!!!)
You Do It for Me - Matt Morris (Justin Timberlake recommends him. Need I say more?)
You Make My Dreams - Hall & Oats (Watch "500 Days of Summer" and you'll know why. )

Now, here are some songs from my Family Vacation playlist. Don't worry, only one more playlist after this one. I saved the best for last. ; )

Back in Time - Huey Lewis & the News ("Back to the Future"...need I say more?!)
Good Day Sunshine - The Beatles (The title says it all.)
Hero (Unplugged) - "Starstruck" soundtrack (Even Joe and I like singing this song.)
High School Musical - "HSM3" (Tricia, your daughter's 5. You'll be here soon!)
New Boyfriend - "Starstruck" soundtrack (It's catchy!)
Power of Love - Huey Lewis & the News (Again..."Back to the Future"!!!)
So They Say - Jamie Cullum (The kids love dancing around to this one.)
Something about the Sunshine - "Startstruck" soundtrack (Summer!)
Much Better - Jonas Brothers (Okay, I have to put one Jonas Brothers song on here! This is my favourite.)

Last one. These songs are from my "Chuck" playlist. The whole family can't stop listening to this one:

Cobrastyle - Soft Machine (Nicole, I always think you would like this song.)
See the World - Gomez (I don't know why but this reminds me of a university summer. Touring around Europe. Having fun.)
Cellphone's Dead - Beck (Abby likes this song because of the girl saying "One by One I'll knock you out". hee, hee!)
Don't You Evah - Spoon (I am loving Spoon!)
Short Skirt/Long Jacket - Cake (C'mon, it's the Chuck theme song.)
Fall Into Place - Apartment (It's fun from the start all the way to the end.)
Private Eyes - Hall & Oats (Okay, it's not a huge recommendation but watching Abby dance to this makes me love it.)
Fresh Feeling - Eels ( "You don't have a clue what it is like to be next to you". That's how the song starts!)
Dropped - Phantom Planet (Don't think for a minute, just get it. It's both rock and dance. It's everything rolled up into one and I LOVE it!)
The Twist - Frightened Rabbit (Great band! In the show there's a big explosion, someone might perform an assassination, and some one's getting ready for a date. All in one song!)
Do You Believe in Love - Huey Lewis & the News (Wind machine ON! - Sorry, inside joke. ; p )
Love it All - The Kooks (I've recommended it. Colleen's recommended it. Get it!)
Diamond Hoo Ha Man - Supergrass (You just want to dance to this. And for the guys, picture two women fighting in a car while this song is playing. Yup.)
Good Days Bad Days - Kaiser Chiefs (English Rock!)
Momma's Boy - Chromeo (I put this song on repeat over and over again. Fun and silly.)
Wannamama - Pop Levi (I dare you to try to stay still during this song. I DARE YOU!)
Tigers in the Fire - Love Grenades (Disco and dancey.)
Bite Hard - Franz Ferdinand (It starts of slow, but......wait for it........that's right!)
Now We Can See - The Thermals (Abby loves this song. My girl's got taste.)
Looking at the Sun - Gramercy Arms (THIS is summer.)
Christmas TV - Slow Club (I know, but I don't think of Christmas. In the show it plays during a wedding on a beach...in May.)
Black & Gold - Sam Sparro (I heard this song while I was at the movies the other day. We both can't be wrong!)
Backward's Walk - Frightened Rabbit (It has the lyric "You're the shit and I'm knee-deep in it.". And it takes a couple listens before you realize what they're saying. Very cool.)
Got Nuffin - Spoon (What can I say, they're an awesome band.)
Amarillion - Datarock (This song reminds me of the 80's and I love it. "I wanna walk you home from school. I wanna take you on a date.")
Merrymaking at My Place - Calvin Harris (Weird intro, but then it gets good.)
Can't Stop Feeling - Franz Ferdinand (Abby approves this selection. )
Astair - Matt Costa (Slow and sweet. It's a man and a guitar. How can you go wrong?)
Swim Until You Can't See Land - Frightened Rabbit (You see the pattern, right? ; ) )
In My Sleep - Austin Hartley-Leonard & Kendall Jane Mead (Okay, not really a summer song, but I can't NOT recommend this song. So sad. So lovely.)
Holiday - Vampire Weekend (Light and fun....then listen to the lyrics. hee, hee!)
Light & Day/Reach for the Sun - The Polyphonic Spree (Just happy.)
Feeling Good - Nina Simone (Surprisingly, the kids LOVE this song. I love the lyrics.)
September - Earth, Wind and Fire (How I feel about this song is well-known. This is my "backyard dance party with a drink in my hand" song.)
Neighbor - Band of Horses (They mention "chipmunks in the backyard". Hello?!)
On My Way Back Home - Band of Horses (They're good...and to me summery.)
Bluebeard - Band of Horses (Sitting around a fire, looking at the stars, listening to this song. I can picture it....even though they do mention "snow".)
Don't Hide Away - Bishop Allen (Upbeat and fun.)
Terrified (with Zachary Levi) - Katharine McPhee (Proof that Zac Levi is the whole package. )

Wow. Okay, that's it. You can agree with my choices. You can disagree with my choices. I don't mind. All I know is that this was fun. : D

Now onto my explanation of a "home" song.......

Twins

2010-06-19T22:11:00.000-04:00

This is Abbigail, my 6 yr old's daughter's, definition of being a twin:

"There is a string that attaches my heart to Stewart's. And even if we're far apart, we will still be together."

She came up with this all on here own. And when asked why she came up with it she said, "So Stewart won't ever be sad if we're not together.".

These are the moments that make it all worth it. The moments when you think to yourself, "Maybe, just maybe I'm doing something right.". Then the moment is gone and you're left to deal with the next challenge. :)

REAL tv

2010-05-22T09:20:00.000-04:00

For the last 3 weeks we've been in "finale season" in tv. For anyone who loves television like I do it's a wonderful time of the year. I've always loved any "sweeps" period when the shows pull out all of the punches to get people to tune in. But as a person who's always been a fan of television, I'm surprised at how few shows I was looking forward to watching. In fact, the grand total is 5. And do you know what is to blame for this? REALITY TV.
We are a society who has turned "fame" into an occupation. An occupation that it seems anyone can apply for. (see Speidi, Paris Hilton, Kate Gosslin) Why?
I will admit when reality tv first started I watched a lot of it....Survivor, The Bachelor, The Bachelorette, Flavour of Love, etc, but then I took a step back and said, "What the hell am I watching?!". These shows are full of people who have no other desire than to get their face in front of a camera for no other reason than to...get their face in front of a camera!
You know those "man on the street" news reports where the reporter is standing in front of a crowd and there's always a handful of people waving their hands like crazy, making pretty much idiots of themselves? That's what these "reality stars" are doing. In the most basic form they're saying "Hey! Look at me!!!!!". Why are you looking?
Critically acclaimed shows don't last anymore because no one is watching them. We'd rather watch Dancing with the Stars or American Idol over and over again. (Two shows which have basically turned into popularity contests.)
Television used to be an art. It was a place where all sides of creativity came together and produced wonderful things. Fun things. Things that made you forget about your life for just a little while and made you wish you were the other guy. Nowadays television has become similar to watching a car accident where we are happy to watch the other guy crash and burn. What does that say about our society?
The one thing I take solace in is the fact that my family is a Nielsen's family. Our votes are being counted and, although it's only 4 votes, every bit counts.
I have especially been concerned with ratings this year because I wasn't confident that my favourite shows would be back again next year. So, I made sure that my vote counted....and I honestly made a difference. For the first time in a while my shows were all picked up early...with exception to one that just squeaked by. (I think it was my personal vote that helped with that one.) :)

The summer is a great time to catch up on shows you might not have watched before. Instead of watching Big Brother 22 why not rent a season of a show you haven't seen before and give it a try? You might just be surprised.

Now, after all that do you want to know what my 5 shows are? Here they are:

Mondays @ 8pm - Chuck (NBC) - For anyone who has never seen an episode of Chuck please try it out. If you like action comedies this is the show for you. It is filled with some amazing stunts but at the same time staying so funny. It's a show that doesn't take itself too seriously.

Wednesdays @ 9 and 9:30pm - Modern Family (ABC) - Everyone's calling it the resurgence of the sitcom. I agree. It is absolutely hilarious and every character is worth watching.
Cougar Town (ABC) - Don't let the name scare you. This is a very well-written, funny show. Just like Modern Family every character hold's their own. It's from the creator of Scrubs and Spin City. And for anyone who got sick of Monica (me included) on Friends, Courtney Cox is no Monica in this one.

Thursdays @ 8 & 9 - Bones (Fox) and Fringe (Fox) - Bones is a forensic show, but it's more about the characters. And Fringe, well, it's this generation's X-Files, but not as creepy.

All that said, there are other shows I do watch when I can, but please remember anything after 10pm from Sun - Tues is past my bedtime. :( That said, I do like Big Bang Theory, Glee, 30 Rock and I am looking forward to catching Lie to Me when it comes back on this summer. I was a faithful Lost viewer for the first 3 seasons and I just haven't been able to keep up anymore. I will tune into the series finale because, well I always like to see how a show end.

Okay, that's it. There's my rant. Just next time you're sitting on the couch watching television, think about what you're watching. Are the people on the shows worth your time? Because if they're not, why are you watching.

Stories

2010-03-02T11:11:00.000-05:00

My dad has always had a very specific way of disciplining. He would weave an entire lecture to put his point across. I am often quoted as saying (in my younger years) that by the time Dad was done with a story I was married and had two kids. I would always tell my mom that I'd rather her just yell at me because my dad's stories seemed torturous to me.
Well, now that I'm all grown up it's a different story. It is truely one of those moments where, as an adult, you are grateful for the actions of your parents when you were a kid....and you know you will be repeating those "methods" with your own kids.  Since they were such good lessons I thought I would put some of them down here for you.

-Heart vs Head Story-
This is a pretty frequent one that occured a lot when I was a teenager.

"Cole, when you make decisions in life you have to make them with part of your head and part with your heart. Your brother makes decisions all with his head and you make them all with your heart. You always need both.
In some cases you need to make them with a bit more of your head than your heart or the other way around, but both must always be present."

-On a Scale of 1 to 10-
I've heard this one since I was a little kid. Whenever I would get hurt either it be a splinter or a stomach cramp the following conversation would occur:

Cole: "It hurts!!!!!!!!!!!"

Dad: "Now, how bad does it really hurt?"

Cole: "Really, really bad!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Dad: "Come on. On a scale of 1 to 10 (10 being your arm cut off.) how bad does it hurt?"

Cole: "It's a 9!"

Dad: "Nicole, your arm is cut off!  That had got to hurt a lot.  How bad does this hurt?"

Cole: "It's a 5?"

Dad: "Your arm is cut off! It is no longer attached to your body! How bad is this splinter?"

Cole (sheepishly): About a 2?"

Dad: "If that. You're fine."

Okay, a side story to this one which I have told many times. When I went to deliver my kids via c-section I found out that the hospital also used the "scale of 1 to 10" pain scale.
While recovering from the c-section the nurse asked me on a scale of 1 to 10 how bad the pain was. Can you guess my response? "3". hee, hee! The nurse was in shock and couldn't understand it. Another nurse came in and asked again what my pain was like. Again I told her 3, but this time I told her that I had been subject to the "scale of 1 to 10" thing my entire life. And I've been accustomed to believing that having your arm cut off would hurt a hell of a lot.

-"No Problem"-
This one is my favourite.
For anyone who doesn't know my dad is a retired police officer. This story is about a collegue of his that he would always bring up when us kids would complain about the various problems in our lives. I don't remember the officer's real name, so I'll call him "Bob".

"There's this guy at work and any time anyone gives him something to do he always would say, "No problem". He'd get the crap jobs piled and piled on him and his response was always the same...."No problem". "Bob can you stay late tonight?" "No problem!". "Bob, can you do some extra paperwork?" "No problem!".
A bunch of the officers who were complaining about something or other couldn't understand it. Why didn't Bob ever get upset? Didn't any of this bug him?
Well, one day they asked him why everything was always "no problem".  It turns out Bob was in the war. And in the war he was dirty, hungry, getting shot at and basically living in hell. Then Bob had a problem! Now.....no problem!
So whatever you're going through remember Bob and his "no problem". Is it really that big of a problem?"

Anyway, those are my three favourite. There were many others over the years, but those three are ones that I know I will tell my own kids.

2010-02-06T09:37:00.000-05:00

I'm a big fan of song lyrics. I am totally convinced they are modern day poems. Anyway, this is one of the songs I just love lately. It's by the Gabe Dixon Band. And if you haven't heard of them check them out on itunes.
Anyway, this is the song......Further the Sky

When you don't know where you're going you don't know why
It feels like another day's bleeding into the night
Lay your head on my chest while my beating heart pounds out the secret of this life

The higher you reach, the further the sky
The more miles you walk, the longer the road
The steeper you climb, the harder you stand to fall
The stronger you get, the heavier the load

I wish I could you give the ansewers in paper and ink
I wish I could stop all the tears before they start falling
But we're feeling our way and we're always beginners
We're all cuts and no scars

The higher you reach, the further the sky

The more miles you walk, the longer the road
The steeper the climb, the harder you stand to fall
The stonger you get, the heavier the load

The bigger the dream, the rougher the ride
The truer the love, the deeper the ache
The blinder the faith, the tougher the goal

The higher you reach, the further the sky
The more miles you walk, the longer the road
The steeper you climb, the harder you stand to fall
The stronger you get, the heavier the load

I know, it's simple and it's been said in many different ways many times over, but I like it. And when I like something I want to share it with the world. Enjoy.

2009 - A Review

2009-12-27T19:15:00.000-05:00

(I know, I know. I haven't been on here in ages. Would you just accept I've been really busy?)

So, we're at the end of 2009 and all I have to say is life is good. Really good! I've seen so much sadness around me this year and yet here I am...still smiling. How is that possible? Maybe because I know how lucky I am. Don't believe me? Here's the list:

1.I've been hopelessly in love with the same man for the last 17 years....and thankfully he's been hopelessly in love with me too. :) To quote Tom Baxter, "See what I'm trying to say is you make things better. And no matter what the day is with you here it's better."

2. I have two wonderful children who can challenge me daily by everything they say and do.....and that's a good thing. They are my greatest achievements in this life and continue to make me proud to be their "momma".

3. I have three of the bestest girlfriends in the world. Ladies, I love you more than words can say. You're the reason I'm looking forward to turning forty. Five years......Vegas!!!!

4. I have made some wonderful new friends this year. It's amazing what you can find lurking around your neighbourhood. ;)

5. I've joined a book club! (When you're an English major who's been out of school for over 10 years things like a book club is very exciting.)

6.I saw a tonne of movies this year.

7. I read A LOT!!!

8. One (hyphenated) word......Self-esteem. I'm not perfect, but I'm a pretty good catch and it's taken me 35 years to believe that.

9. I love my job.

10. I've somehow become my mother and I'm okay with it. She's not a bad person to be. :)

Anyway, there are so many other reasons for why I am full of happiness this year. Sure, there's been stress, but life is pretty wonderful.

So, my wish for 2010? That I continue to view my world through those rose-coloured glasses. :)

10 years

2009-08-07T01:06:00.000-04:00

To my love,
Today is our 10th wedding anniversary. Even though I've often said that we've always been like "an old married couple" from the get-go, we finally are one! And in this year, more than any other, I want you to know how much I love and appreciate you. You are my heart and soul. You know me....the good and the bad...and you still love me despite it all. How did I get so lucky the first time round?

Well, you know me and you know how much I love quotes and songs. So, here's one for you. A song from Take That because well, you know how much of an anglophile I am and because I only thought it fitting that we went a little retro.

I'll love you forever Joseph.
Love,
Cole

Nobody Else

Making my way through photographs
Of the night when you first stood by my side
Old friends with smiles some are here some are gone
Good memories of our senior high
Looking back we're the only couple still together
Even then I knew this love would be forever, I knew

Cause there's nobody else in the world that could love you
Anymore than I do, always here for you
Nobody else in the world could love you more
Nobody could love you anymore than I do
I'm still here for you

Our lives have all changed we've come a long long way
Our faces show the lines of two young songs
And in their houses there will be pictures
Like the ones of you and me
Hope they can look back and smile just like we have done
Never once have I felt the need for another
We were strong and survived the storm in time to discover

Cause there's nobody else in the world that could love you
Anymore than I do, always here for you
Nobody else in the world could love you more
Nobody could love you anymore than I do
I'm still here for you

All of the smiles we have won
Just from looking back and reliving all the good times
And when we've been through all the pages
We just start again, oh

Cause there's nobody else in the world that could love you
Anymore than I do, always here for you
Nobody else in the world could love you more
Nobody could love you anymore than I do
I'm still here for you

Anger Song

2009-07-08T17:08:00.000-04:00

So, my friend was making an "angry playlist" and asked me for some suggestions. I gave her some and then started thinking about what my favourite angry songs are. I knew it would be based on lyrics more than sounds because, well I am a fan of words. I am fan of the idea that you can put words together and through that you can express feeling. And how someone can use those words to express their own feelings, but in return express the exact same feelings of a complete stranger. I think I am daily amazed by that fact.

Anyway, back to the anger......

Here is my favourite (if you can call it that) angry song. It's not loud or hard, but to me the lyrics are powerful. Mostly because we've all been there. We've all wanted to say to someone, "You fucked up.". It's a rant and it's a good one. So, I thought I would share with all of you. And if you haven't heard of this guy you need to.

"You've Got You" - by Eric Hutchinson

I've got a bone to pick with you and this opportunity
i couldn't live this down enough to make up for you and me
i feel a swelling in my soul i've been choking up inside
i'd bite my tongue just for your sake but i'd swallow too much pride

and who will be sorry first who will be sorry first
and if you won't be the one to budge i can tell what i am worth
and you've got you to blame for what you do to you
there's nothing shocking so it must be true
and let me set this record straight on the drama you create before you go and turn your back on me

i've got a lot to pay you back i've been saving up for years
i'm gonna break you into two now who's gonna hear your tears
i've been the friend you never had now you'll never have me back
i bear a witness to your faults and that line's severely cracked

and who will be sorry first who will be sorry first
and if you won't be the one to budge i can tell what i am worth
and you've got you to blame for what you do to you
there's nothing shocking so it must be true
and let me set this record straight on the drama you create before you go and turn your back on

you're gonna live your life and stay on your side
you're not ashamed to try you're more afraid of why
this bridge is burning now it's caving in
we're never gonna win we'll run in circles till we fall in line

and who will be sorry first who will be sorry first
and if you won't be the one to budge I can tell what I am worth

What do you think?

2009-07-08T12:58:00.000-04:00

I have this weird habit. Every time I'm using the microwave (whether it be to pop popcorn, heat up a heating bag, or just reheating a meal) I use the allotted time as a timer. Instead of just standing in front of the microwave, waiting for what is in there to be done, I run around trying to get various tasks done before the time is up. I have actually perfected unloading a dishwasher in under 2 minutes. Getting lunches made for the next day, no problem! It's like a challenge.
Am I the only person out there who does this? I know no man ever does this as it is multitasking, but does any woman? I know, we don't stand still waiting for the microwave stop because, well, women hardly ever stand still, but does anyone else look at it as a challenge?
Okay, let me know.....and I already know I'm weird. That's a given. :)

The answer

2009-04-05T08:44:00.000-04:00

Fact: I do not have the time to go out and party, get drunk, etc.

Do I have people who would be happy to look after my children? Sure do!

Do I have a husband who is supportive of me having a night out? Yup!

So, why don't I go out? Because I have to pay for it the next day. I don't mean having a hangover because that's a given. I mean, I drink so little that I feel the effects of alcohol after about half a pomtini.

This is what I mean. One day of me not cleaning, tidying and general care of my house results in another full day's work of making up for it. For example, yesterday I spent the day downtown with Stew and then the whole family went over to my brother's for dinner. This morning I have woken up to a floor that desperately needs sweeping, 2 loads of laundry to fold, dirty dishes piled up in the sink, couches full of various backpacks, hats, mitts, etc, one kid who needs a bath, two kids who need to do homework, and two lunches that need to be made for tomorrow. Plus I have to run out this afternoon!
And I don't have a choice to leave it one extra day. My home is my place of work. I have daycare kids coming tomorrow. It must be done!
So, even if I have someone willing to take the kids for the night and Joe's fine with it. I can tell you now, even if I was able to sleep in the next day, I would still have to do all this work to get ready for the next day. And I know what you're thinking..."Why don't you do all of that before you go out?". Even if I did, at least half of it would reappear the next day!

That, to answer my lovely family's question, is why I do not go out and get royally pissed. I do not have the time. Sure if you had someone come over and look after my kids as well as tidy up the house I might consider it, but we all know I'd say no to that. Why? Because I cannot stand inconveniencing people and there's no way I'm gonna let someone else clean up my family's mess. So, thanks but no thanks.
I'll stick to my dinner or movie, or tea out with a friend. Maybe have a drink at the pub, but only one and not after midnight. ;)
My time is up. Breakfast is done. Must start tidying.

Computer habits

2009-02-26T22:34:00.001-05:00

Right now on the computer I have the following windows open:
- iTunes
- Facebook
- Webkinz
- a digital copy of Midnight Sun
...and I'm blogging in this window.

When Joe's on the computer he can only have one window open at a time. If I have anything else open he has to close it all out.

I think that is just a great observation in our differences. I multi-task my ass off and Joe.....God love him. I know I do. ;)

Daddy

2009-02-26T22:09:00.000-05:00

Tomorrow is my dad's last day of work. 35 years as a police officer. And in case anyone notices the similarity of years to my age....yup, dad found out mom was pregnant and decided to get a new, stable career.
Anyway, I'm sure some have heard that as a retirement gift to himself my dad is taking the entire family (10 of us) to Disneyworld for a vacation. When I found this out I am sure you can imagine I was all "Woo, hoo!". I didn't really think much of it, but was just thankful for the upcoming gift.
Later on my mom and I were talking a little more about it and she told me the reason Dad was taking us all on this vacation was to make up for all the time he missed when we were growing up. Here's the thing.....I don't remember him missing anything. Okay, when I really started thinking about it I remember some family dinners were missed and he was absent for some holidays, but not enough to say my father was an absent parent. In fact, if anyone has heard me talk about my dad it's only praise.
So, I guess what I really want to say is...we parents always worry about how much time we spend with our kids, but as kids if the time spent is quality time then really it doesn't matter about the quantity.

Daddy, I am so proud of you. Not just for being the best police officer I have ever met, but for being the best man. Congratulations on a wonderful career. I hope mom lets you relax now that you're home more often. I love you to bits and bits.....always have.....always will.

For Paul

2009-02-23T18:24:00.000-05:00

I'm sorry. I can't. She's my best friend.

;p

In it for the long haul

2009-02-20T21:28:00.000-05:00

To quote "Mad About Love".....
"'You put up with my crap and I put up with your crap?'
'That's marriage?'
'This is what I'm thinking.'"

Words to live by. :)

Ladies, you can't change your man. If you can't accept him the way he is then move on. Would you like it if he tried to change you?

There's no back story to this post. It's just one of the philosophies I live by. My husband's not perfect and I'm okay with that. Why? Because I am nowhere near perfect, but he still loves me to bits. :)

Pondering a though....

2009-02-01T12:26:00.000-05:00

It's been 10 years since I was last in a classroom and I have finally hit that point where I miss it. Well, I don't miss the whole worry over grades and stuff like that, but I miss the learning aspect of it. I miss the studying of a piece of literature to find the various, intricate layers. I miss studying so much that I've gotten to the point of highlighting and writing little notes on the various books I'm reading....okay, the Twilight saga.
I'd like to be in a book club, but I can't really find one. I've tried to start one up with my girlfriends, but we all know that when we get together we'll just chat.
I was thinking of looking into an online course or a night course. Nothing too deep, but more for the fun of it. I guess we'll just have to see. Do I have too much on my plate already? I think I'll have to think more about this. :)

To Andrew

2009-01-21T20:29:00.000-05:00

You are not my older brother. You are my younger brother. So, I'd really appreciate it if you stop talking down to me. Just because you are a cop does not make the overall authority over life. I might not see the world the way you do, but I don't need to be educated on it. I like my "rose coloured glasses" and the view they give me.
I don't need to buy a new house. Yes, our house is small. Yes, sometimes it's cramped, but it's home and I like it.
I don't need a new job. I like what I do. I am proud of what I do. I might not protect lives, but I help raise them. People ask me to look after their most precious possessions and I do a damn good job at it! I feel at home, at peace in my job right now and that can only mean that I am doing what I should be.
No, we don't have a lot of money. We can't buy people fancy presents and go on luxurious vacations, but we know how to give our love and our time.
I believe in creativity, poetry, music, literature, and art. I believe in imagination and escapism and expression. And I will do my best to teach my children what it all means.
No, this might not be "the real world" but it is the world I choose to live in.
So, how about showing me a little bit of respect and stop talking to me like you're my father. I already have one of those and he's a damn good one. I really don't need another. That badge you wear does not make you an authority on everything. I have opinions on things and in some areas I might just know a lot more than you. So quit it.
All that said...I'm a chicken. I know I'll never tell you this because I know I can't win an argument with you. And you (as we all know) are always right. So, I'm gonna get my feelings out the only way I know how. This is my blog, my journal. In here I can say whatever I want. I might regret this later, but right now, well, I'm letting my feelings be heard.
Your Sister,
Cole
P.S. I'll always love you.

Be a good neighbour!

2009-01-11T20:37:00.000-05:00

The people at the north end of my street just moved in in the spring. This is their first winter on our street. So far they are not good neighbours. They are the last ones to shovel their sidewalk and now they are not even removing the pile of snow at the end of the sidewalk where the snowplow went by. This pile of snow has been there for over a week. This is becoming a safety hazard for me and the kids I look after...why? Because every time we walk to and from school I have to try and get my kids over this large and wide pile of snow onto the road to then cross it. This is not safe.
On Friday while walking home with my kids (on the road I might add because it was just easier then getting them to scale the snow pile) I finally ran into someone who lived in the house. I asked them very kindly to remove this snow pile because of it being a safety hazard. The young woman was very nice, said she understood, apologized and said it would be done. I told her as long as it's done by Monday I'm fine. It's still not done.
Now, I have to be a bitch, call the city, get it removed and then they will send them a bill for it. Fuck! I have 5 kids I have to walk to school tomorrow! Why are people such lazy assholes?! We have seniors on our street!
I hate being a bitch!
To be continued......

You're only as old as you feel

2009-01-03T09:22:00.000-05:00

I'm trying to figure out how to write this without coming across as pathetic. I know what I want to say, but I'm trying to figure out the words. I might as well just jump in and start swimming.....

I have a friend who is convinced that I will never grow up. (See, that comes across bad, but it's not!)
Okay, I'll try it from another angle.....

I have a really vast and detailed memory. As a result I remember all the way back to when I was just turning three. No, I don't think I remember from pictures...I have a very detailed memory of visiting my mom in the hospital after she had my brother. I remember the lobby, what my mom was wearing, the family that were there and the special lollipop I got. My husband has joked before that he could never win an argument with me because I'll not only repeat back to him what he has said, but when it was said, where we were and sometimes what we were wearing.
This memory has served me well in life. In high school I not only knew my class schedule, but that of my friends.... okay, and the boy I liked. :) And as far as movies go well, I'm the person you call when you see someone in something and you can't remember what else you saw them in. (Of course, I'm really not needed anymore with IMDB available to everyone.)
But here's where this memory has also served me well....I remember what it is like to be 5 or 13 or 18 or 23. And I use it depending on whom I'm with. With my kids I'm able to make fun out of little things. I know it's fun to just play...to pretend...to scream and yell for a while.
I also remember what it's like to be a teenager. For little things to mean a big deal. To not quite get the whole responsibility thing and wonder what everyone else's problem is. ;)
I am a defender of youth. I'm not talking the whole party scene and all that crap. Hell, I didn't do that the first time around. (And some of the stuff teenage girls do nowadays.....well, I'm just wondering if they were all born without a conscience.) But the enjoyment of life. The silliness of it all. And maybe that's why I'm reluctant to give it up. But also, just maybe, it has to do with the fact that my kids will be teenagers at one point and I never want them to think they can't talk to me.
So, since my teenage years revolved more around movies, music, and stars that is what I am still very much in touch with. I still like watching movies over and over again. And I still get fixated on one celebrity for a while which means I have to watch every movie he's ever been in. (Right now it's Vince Vaughn.) And I have one little tribute to my teenage years that I keep in my kitchen....my old bulletin board. The one that was plastered with pictures when I was younger is still a collage of images. Now it includes more friends and family, the things the kids are interested in (like Camp Rock and Indiana Jones), and the kids' school calender, but I still make my presence known.

So, maybe my friend is right...maybe I will never grow up. But I think I'm okay with that.

There, that's not too pathetic is it?

Christmas memories

2008-12-16T18:28:00.000-05:00

Okay, okay, I've been bad. I should have been on here ages ago. I'd say November was uneventful, so I didn't bother writing, but the truth was it was too busy that I just didn't have time to write. And of course whenever I did have time I couldn't think of anything to write. Now....well I'm making time.
What to write about? Well, Christmas of course!
I have to say this has been one of those years when all of those cliche's have actually occurred. Remember how Clark Griswold just wants "an old-fashioned family Christmas"? Well, it seems I'm kinda having that this year. I've been in the middle of moments and thinking to myself, "This is the kind of thing you see in movies.". It's been a good year so far. :)
First, we went to cut down our tree as we do every year. We go on a Tuesday because that's when Joe is off of work and it's just a lot less busy. Okay, it's usually empty. This year we headed out early because there was a chance that the temperature was going to rise and the beautiful snow was going to turn into rain. Well it didn't rain while we were out. Instead there were big flakes of snow falling, lovely silence, packing snow and the wonderful smell of Christmas trees everywhere. To quote Linus from, well, The Great Pumpkin.....there was "nothing but sincerity as far as the eye can see.". It was beautiful and perfect.
The second moment came after the kids' Christmas concert last week. Since we live so close to Abby and Stew's school (and parking is minimal) we decided to walk over to the concert. Once the concert was over it was about 8pm. It was a nice, clear night and it wasn't too cold. The kids starting singing Christmas carols and the next thing you know all four of us were singing "The Twelve Days of Christmas" while walking home in the dark. It was so cheesy it was nice.
Anyway, there have been many more moments like that so far this holiday season. I can't help but consider myself blessed to have such wonderful memories of my kids. How did I get so lucky?

2008-10-29T13:53:00.000-04:00

I have always had a distinct memory of being read a specific book in grade one at Lord Roberts Public School. I remember sitting in the library and although I never knew the entire story I knew enough how it went. It was about a boy who went for a sleepover, but didn't want to bring his teddy bear because he was afraid his friend would laugh at him. I know there have been many versions of this specific story, but this one was the original.
Well, for umm 29 years now I have had that story in the back of my head. Here and there trying to search for it, but since I had no title or author I had no luck.
Today, I was at my kids' school library volunteering like I do and there sitting on top of a shelf was "Ira Sleeps Over" by Bernard Waber. The moment I saw it I knew that was the book!!! Obviously I took it out to read it to my kids.
The search is over!!!

Thoughts running through my head right now.....

2008-10-23T23:44:00.000-04:00

*I really like the word "twitterpated" :)

*I should go to bed.

*My shoulders really hurt from plunging that toilet today!

*I think you're avoiding me.

*I need to lose weight.

*I miss adult conversation about nothing.

*I need to go shopping tomorrow.

*I wonder if I'm going to be able to get a good picture of the kiddies for the Christmas card this year.

*I just want to skip Halloween and go straight to Christmas.

*I miss school. I want to study something.

*I need to lose weight.

*I miss you. :(

The belt

2008-10-05T08:31:00.000-04:00

When Stew was around 2 my friend Simon gave Stewart one of his old belts that he had when he was a kid. It's a nylon belt that had a big plastic buckle on it. He gave it to Stew because (at the time) Stewart was fascinated with plastic buckles of any kind.....car seat buckles, high chair buckles you name it.

Well, Stew would play with it here and there, but basically it lived in his closet. That is, until this week. For the last 5 nights Stewart has been wearing the belt to bed. Yup, to bed. He's also worn it around during the day, but he always has to make sure he has it on when he goes to bed. I have no idea why this is! Does it has some special super power that helps you sleep at night? Has it become a new comfort item for him? (Forget the stuffed Curious George...make sure the belt is on!) He put it on the night before he turned 5 and has worn it every night since!

Anyway, I'm perplexed. I have no idea how long this will go on, but from here on out I will be on "belt watch".

A conversation

2008-10-01T16:26:00.000-04:00

Cole: "I really want to see Eagle Eye."

Joe: "Why?"

Cole: "Because it looks good."

Joe: "I don't think so."

Cole: "I heard it was really good."

Joe: "I don't think so."

Cole "It is! I really want to see it!"

Joe: "Why?"

Cole: "Okay, because Shia's all scruffy in it and I like scruffy."

Joe: "He's a kid."

Cole: "He is not."

Joe: "He's a kid!"

Cole: "He is not! He's 21."

Joe: "Cole, that's a kid."

Cole: "Argh!"

Not a good day

2008-09-30T21:36:00.000-04:00

Today was a bad mom day. One of those days where, by the time it ends you feel completely broken. Anyone who's a mom knows what that's like. You start your day off well, but it feels like no matter what you do there is someone there to mess it up.
My two were at each other's throats today. Everything was a battle. Nothing was easy and by the end of it I think they were sent into time out or to their room more than they were out of it. Then the last straw happened. Stewart wrecked a pinata that I had been making for his birthday on the weekend. This occurred while I was making dinner and my darling husband was having a 3 hour nap. At that point I lost it. I finished making dinner, actually dished it out for everyone but me, then went downstairs while they ate. What did I do? I vacuumed the freakin basement!!! With my ipod on so I could drown out the world but still.
Once everyone started coming downstairs because their dinner was done, I went up....to find a bunch of dishes just sitting on the counter. So, I opened up the fridge and started downing a Strongbow. Yup, it was either that or scream.
I hate days like this.

A pause

2008-09-29T16:35:00.001-04:00

I'm having one of those emotional moments right now. You know those ones where you literally feel like you are just going to burst with every and any type of emotion? Like your feelings are raw and exposed on your skin? No specific reason for this reaction. Just life.
I wonder if men ever feel like this? Probably not. If they did they'd understand the phase, "have a good cry".
My son came home with a cut out heart accidentally taped onto his shirt sleeve. He was wearing his heart on his sleeve. Maybe it was a sign?
Must go push the play button on life. There's dinner to make and two kids to taxi to gymnastics. Oh, to be a mom.

That funky feeling....

2008-09-27T23:07:00.000-04:00

has gone yet again. Fingers crossed it's gone for good. Yeah right, but we can only hope!

My girls

2008-09-27T04:24:00.000-04:00

I was watching the Sex and the City movie the other night and I was left with a couple of thoughts.
1. I love that I have the same kind of close girlfriends that I would do anything for.

2. I wish we got to see each other more often. :(

My heart

2008-09-22T22:23:00.000-04:00

I have this theory about hearts. Your heart is like a large piece of land that is divided up into smaller pieces of real estate. There are certain people that come into your life and take ownership of those pieces of real estate. You're heart no longer belongs to you, but belongs to others. Some pieces you give away freely. Others are taken without your knowledge. And sometimes, there are pieces that you find you didn't even know were there to give.
I have many people that I love in my life and then there are those who own a piece of my heart. It can be both a wonderful and scary thing. I hope they're all good investors. :)

a time for change

2008-09-13T09:03:00.000-04:00

I quit my job. Well, I quit one of my jobs. The one that took me out of my home. The part time one at M&M's. I am really excited about this. Why? Because even though there are days that I will be looking after 6 kids it still won't be as bad as some of the customers I have had at the store. I mean, you can put a kid in a time out for behaving badly, but you can't do that to a customer.
I am also looking forward to not working in a store during the Christmas season. To be able to watch Christmas specials, do silly crafts and have fun with the daycare kids is making me giddy with anticipation!
I am going to miss the people I work with. The socializing of it all. I have been lucky to make some very good friends while I worked there....and one who was a complete surprise. But thanks to email, facebook and and overall effort I know we will stay friends.
So, I have 5 shifts left and then I am done. I have achieved my goal which was to be gone before my mom (who is also my manager) retire. And now I start the new job of a full time daycare provider. I still know there will be tough days, but I'm up for it. And I also get 3 day weekends! Woo hoo!!

And now for the ugly...

2008-09-10T20:16:00.000-04:00

My daughter has started gaining weight in a very short time. Just over this summer and it is quite noticeable in everyone who sees her. Now I'm not saying she's chubby, but basically she has gone from petite to now solid. This is a bit stressful for me and I'll tell you why.
For my entire life my mom has always said the same thing about me..."Nicole, you were really petite until senior kindergarten and then, all of a sudden, you just got bigger and bigger.". And what grade has Abby just started? SK. Is she going to follow in my footsteps? God, I hope not! This is one genetic trait I really didn't want to pass down.
I am just so afraid of all of this. I always hated the way my parents handled my weight issue. The bribes, the "do you really need that?"...it all drove me crazy and just made me dislike myself and my family even more.
I hate what this is doing to me. I hate the worry over all of it. I want to tell her that she'll be loved no matter what size she is and that she is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. That she is so bright and loving and full of energy.
I am just so scared. I know what the wrong way is to handle all of this, but I just don't know what the right way is. Argh!

Catching up

2008-09-10T06:42:00.001-04:00

Okay, so I've kinda been slacking in my blog posts as of late. What can I say, it was a busy summer. And since we just got back from a trip to PEI and Quebec I have a lot of laundry I'm avoiding right now.
I find it funny that the moment you don't have a computer around in the time when you feel like writing. I mean, I think I pretty much thought of a blog entry every day while I was away. But since I was at a cottage in PEI....they pretty much stayed in my head.
So, what should I start with? The good, the bad or the ugly? Lets start with the good.......
I read three books while I was away! The first three of the Twilight series. Yes, like the rest of the world I am hooked....and sad to know I only have one book left. There is nothing better than finding a book you like and just wanting to read it all of the time. I spent my evenings at the cottage curled up on a couch reading. It was lovely....and relaxing. It was what I needed and it felt so good.

Now the bad, ugh! I lost my self confidence again. Okay, this one will need a bit of a back story. For my entire life (up until about two months ago) I had very little self confidence. I can put on a wonderful facade, but the truth is I feel like I have zero self worth. I always had this feeling that if I walked into a place everyone there was looking around at me thinking, "Why is she here?!". My 20's were complete crap for the simple reason that they were to go out and socialize and I was too damn afraid to do it. My poor housemates at university would try to get me to go out with them, but I often said no. I was always jealous that they were able to go out and have fun, but I just couldn't bring myself to go.
Okay, here's a soul bearing truth.....my husband was the first boy I ever dated, the first one that I really thought saw any interest in me.....and there has always been that small part of me that thought...if he ever left me there would be no one else in the world that would want me. Blech! I know, I know!
Anyway, I don't know what happened...whether it be that I was sick for so long and finally felt better, or it was that I went off to the big city on my own to watch a concert...anyway, I suddenly was filled with self confidence. I was more social than I've ever been in my entire life and loving it. I felt like I had something to offer the world. Suddenly all the worry and stress I had about all the little things in life was gone and I was feeling wonderful!
Here's an example of how good my frame of mind was....I was to meet a friend for a movie and he was 45 minutes late....and I didn't care! I mean, after 15 minutes I normally would have nearly been in tears from my brain working so fast to try and figure out what had happened. I can honestly tell you I was as cool as a cucumber! I just sat there, gave myself a time limit and enjoyed the silence of not having 6 kids talking to me at once. I even had a guy come up to me and say "Your getting stood up by your date too?" and I didn't care! I found the whole thing funny!
Sadly, that self confidence disappeared while I was on vacation. I really hated to see it go. I'm really not sure what made it disappear. Was it the sudden change of my parents not following us to Quebec city? Was it the strain of trying to translate french for four people? Or was it that damn full length mirror in the cottage in PEI? Whatever it was, it sucked it all away. Hopefully this is just a little funk and the new, confident me will arise again soon.
Oh, the ugly is going to have to wait until another post. Must go get the kiddies breakfast and send them off for their first day of SK!

Frustration

2008-08-23T15:30:00.000-04:00

ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

That's it. That's all I'm saying. I just needed to get that off of my chest.

"My balls!"

2008-07-29T22:21:00.000-04:00

Stew was in our backyard practicing with his new golf set when Joe went by with the lawnmower (not running). Well, the lawnmower ran over a couple of the golf balls. Stew yelled out, "My balls!" and all I could think was "I bet that won't be the only time you'll make that remark in your lifetime.".
Sorry, I just had to share.
Oh, and the balls were fine.

What a night!!!

2008-07-20T09:06:00.000-04:00

Since I have two posts on here about whether I was going to go to the George Michael concert, I only think it fits that I should now say how it was. To quote the man himself, it was "Amazing"!!!!!!!
First off, it was completely worth the price of admission and for all of those who wanted to go but were not willing to pay that price.....you missed out! It was like one giant dance party where everyone was there to have fun. I looked around the audience and you couldn't see anyone standing still...everyone was moving!
My seat was better than I thought it was. I was actually in shock at how good my seat was. Considering I had never been to the ACC before I really didn't know what to expect. It was a nice surprise. I sat down and went straight into a conversation with the people around me. It ended up the girl beside me was there by herself too. And the couple in front of us were so nice. Even though the show didn't start until 8:50 we were passing the time chatting.

For anyone wondering, here's the playlist for the night:
Air Canada Centre, 07/17/2008
SET LIST:
First Half
Waiting (Reprise)
Fast Love/I'm Your Man
Father Figure
Hard Day
Everything She Wants
One More Try
Easier Affair
Too Funky
Star People

Interval
John & Elvis video

Second Half
Faith
Spinning The Wheel
Feeling Good
Roxanne
Kissing A Fool
Amazing
Flawless
Outside
Different Corner

Careless Whisper
Fantasy
Freedom 90
Freedom Reprise

As you can see it was one great night and I loved every minute of it! I met some new friends and got some exercise from dancing my ass off! I stepped out of my box doing this by myself and it was worth it. I'd do it again in a heartbeat. It was one great birthday present! One I won't forget any time soon.
Now I must go make myself some tea in my new "Faith" mug.

A very weird dream

2008-07-14T21:38:00.000-04:00

This is a dream that I had on Saturday night. Actually, it is the one I woke up from on Sunday morning and it took a bit to get out of my head. Let me tell you about the dream and then I'll tell you why.

This is how I remember my dream starting:

I was in a little Mexican variety store buying some type of plastic box that was about the size of my hand. I don't really remember anything about it only that it was then put in a grocery bag and before I left I turned to the old lady behind the counter and asked her if she had any smack I could buy. (Yup, you read it right.) She took me to the back of the store where I purchased a couple of tiny bags of white powder. I looked at it not really sure what to do with it. I put some in my mouth under my tongue and was about to walk out. Nothing was happening, so I turned around to the old lady and motioned to the top of her tongue meaning that was where I was supposed to put it. So, I did that with the second package. Then things started to happen. It was like everything started shaking and I was all jittery. It was like my brain couldn't stay still. It was like it was buzzing if that makes sense.
Next thing I know I am walking through the Civic parking lot going north. Then I started having this internal conversation of "Oh my god I just ingested drugs! I am now high! I can't go home to Joe and the kids like this. Do people know I am high?" Anyway, that is where I woke up...still a little freaked out.

Here's the crazy thing......I have never taken drugs in my entire life!! Hell, I haven't even had a drag of a cigarette. My friend Mary once asked me to hold her cigarette for her and I looked like I was holding the most foreign object in my hands. I don't even think the drug I asked for in my dream goes with what I received or how I ingested it. So, how did I dream about a drug trip?! It kinda freaked me out because it felt so real.

Anyway, I just had to share my crazy mind.

Women!

2008-07-01T07:04:00.000-04:00

Last night Joe and I went to see "Wanted". First off.....amazing!!!! It totally satisfied the tomboy in me who can appreciate a good action movie. But this blog entry isn't really about that.
While we were waiting for the movie to start I was doing the thing I always do.....judging everyone who walks in on whether they will be a "talker" or not. This woman walked in who caught my eye. Right away she looked like someone who was in the wrong theatre. She was probably in her 60's, frumpy and just completely out of place among the rest of the theatre which consisted mostly of men in their early 20's and their dates. Then, just as the lights were going down, two more women sat down beside her who look pretty much just like her. I leaned over to Joe and said, "They do not know what they're coming to see. They are not going to like this movie.".
Okay, lets fast-forward to the end of the movie where I am walking out of the theatre with the massive crowd. I am just about to say to Joe, "I loved that! It was amazing! Did I laugh too loud at the exploding rat part?", when behind me I hear "Well, that was a complete waste of money!". I turned around to see where it was coming from and who was standing behind me? Yup, the three ladies out for a girl's night to see a movie.
I actually started to laugh at this point. This woman kept going on and on about the faults of the movie. I was so tempted to turn around and say to her:
"Lady, I knew from the moment you walked into the theatre that you weren't going to like this movie. It was an action movie. It was a graphic action movie. And if you couldn't have figured that out within the first five minutes it's your own fault that your money was wasted. You should have got up, went to the ticket booth and exchanged your tickets for "Sex and the City" which is where you belonged."
But I didn't say that. Instead, I just happily laughed away as I walked to my car. Still high from seeing a great movie.

"You look familiar to me"

2008-06-30T14:27:00.000-04:00

I have heard the above quote at least once a week since I was in university. I don't know what happened in those years that made me look so "familiar". I've heard it so much that I don't even try to figure out if I actually know the person anymore. I just assume it's a mistaken identity and dismiss the claim even before it's been made.
And here's the funny thing....I am not always mistaken for the same person. I have been home, in Toronto and even Niagara Falls and been confused for someone else. And it is never the same person!
So, I know the theory about doppelgangers, but my question is can you have more than one? Or am I just so average looking that I look like many people? And have people who really do know me gone up to a stranger and thought she was me?
So many questions......

My passion

2008-06-23T11:34:00.000-04:00

I am a fan of quotes....lyrical, movie, tv, just about anything written down or said I love. I love that someone can string words together and it can just inspire you. It can inspire you to laugh, to love, to cry....just to think.
So, considering my facebook page can no way contain all of the quotes I have admired and enjoyed over the years I thought I would start writing them down here. There is no rhyme or reason to any of this. When one pops in my head I am going to write it down and send it into cyberspace. Maybe when they are all put together they will make up me as a whole. Who knows.....

"He's an asshole. Anyone with a haircut like that, you know he's an asshole."
- Weird Science (movie)

"Can I tell you something personal?"
"I mean, we're in the shower. How much more personal can you get?"
- Surf's Up (movie)

"He's a dirty trashcan full of poop."
- Surf's Up (movie)

"Dave likes to wear dirty underwear."
- Alvin & the Chipmunks (movie)

"Fifty years from now, when you're looking back at your life, don't you want to be able to say you had the guts to get in the car?"
- Transformers (movie)

"I crashed my van into Jesus!"
- Saved (movie)

"Of course I'm home. I'm always home. I'm uncool."
- Almost Famous (movie)

"Here is a line that you won't understand
I'm half of the boy but twice the man"
- Who did you think I was (song)

"Here eyes were so blue, they looked like weather"
- It'll all work out (song)

"Like the ocean needs the moon to take the tides away
All we need’s a little time to chase the blues away
Sun is out and it feels like it’s always gonna stay
Let this last forever, turn tomorrow into yesterday"
- Into Yesterday (song)

The Pivot Questionnaire

2008-06-22T19:56:00.000-04:00

If you watch "Inside the Actor's Studio" regularly you probably will agree the best part of the show is the Pivot questionnaire. (For anyone who hasn't seen the show it is a series of questions "made famous by Bernard Pivot".) And if you're anything like me you have thought of the answers you would give if you were ever asked by James Lipton.
Well, I'm never going to be asked by James Lipton, but I thought what's the point of a blog if you can't write down what you want. So, here are my answers to the Pivot Questionnaire...

1.What is your favourite word?
Love

2. What is your least favourite word?
"Do you really need that?" (I know it's a phrase not a word, but anyone who truly knows me will know why I hate it.)

3. What turns you on creatively, spiritually, emotionally?
Love in every way, shape and form it comes in.

4. What turns you off?
Inequality

5. What is your favourite curse word?
"He's a dirty trash can full of poop." I know it's not really a curse word, but I just love it!

6. What sound or noise do you love?
Okay, I don't know if I'll be able to describe this properly, but the sound of a finger sliding on a guitar string. Not just someone sitting there sliding their fingers up and down a guitar, but when it happens while someone is playing a guitar. Complete heaven!

7. What sound or noise do you hate?
Actually silence drives me bonkers more than anything else. Complete silence can drive me over the bend.

8. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt?
I always wanted to work in the movie archives.

9. What profession would you not like to do?
Anything that involves me working alone in silence.

10. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?
"Have you lost weight?"

I have a problem

2008-06-04T22:11:00.001-04:00

Anyone who knows me knows how I feel about men and facial hair. I love it! I love it so much that part of my husbands wedding vow was that he would never shave his beard off. (Okay, I kid.)
I know I am part of a minority when it comes to the clean shaven vs scruff debate, but I didn't think anything of it....until tonight.
I just saw a commercial for the new Adam Sandler movie You Don't Mess with the Zohan and I thought he looked cute! Adam Sandler! The man who admits to having the most egg-shaped head around! How did a hair cut and a beard make me think he looks hot?!
This isn't the first time this had happened. I once saw a SNL retrospective and thought David Spade was cute!
Obviously, the problem is me. I have become so obsessed with facial hair that I now think any man with a bit of scruff on his face is yummy. There has got to be a 12 step program for this, right? Oh, I'm in trouble!

It's official......I'm old

2008-06-03T21:11:00.000-04:00

I've always been a person who looked forward to birthdays. I never had a problem with them or the idea of growing older. My 30th birthday came and went and I felt no different, 31 was easy, 32...no problem, 33...a piece of cake. Now, in two days I am turning 34. I'm having a problem with that.

I think it has to do with a number of factors all fusing together right now.

First off I was sick for a whole month this May. That has resulted in me just feeling lazy and tired a lot.

Second, for the last three years there have always been students at my work and they were the ones I talked to. Now, they have all left and I miss them terribly. I miss that aspect of my personality that was brought out when my youngins were around. They made me smile. Since they have all left I have to act my age which is no fun.

Third, I am quite aware that as I enter my 34th year it is closer to mid-30's and eventually my 40's and as young as I might feel 40 is old...there's no other way of looking at it.

So, I am finally here. I am a full-fledged grown up.......and I hate it.

To whom it may concern

2008-06-02T14:35:00.000-04:00

I miss you.

Making noise

2008-04-17T19:28:00.000-04:00

Here is something that has always fascinated me.....how is it possible that boys are born with the ability to make the best sound effects for cars running, chases, guns shooting, swords (and light sabers) fighting, etc? You put a toy car in any female's hands and the sound will pretty much just be a vroom. Males, on the other hand, have the ability to make revving noises, skids...well, you name it! How?! As I am writing this I am listening to my son pretending his Boba Fett is shooting....something and the sound is just like a ray gun (or is it laser gun?) would be.
I pride myself at knowing enough about Superheros, Transformers, Lord of the Rings and Star Wars to have a pretty decent conversation with a group of men, but if they ever asked me to imitate the sound made when Optimus Prime transforms into an 18-wheeler I'd be screwed!

I did it

2008-04-07T19:55:00.000-04:00

Section 119, row 25. Dinner plans are already made for before hand. I feel a little selfish and rebellious. Never done anything like this in my entire life. At 33 (almost 34) it's about time.

What should I do?

2008-04-06T19:58:00.000-04:00

Okay, I have a bit of a problem. Not in a huge life problem like, "what is my purpose here on earth". Not even in a minute "where is the remote" kind of problem. Here's my problem......can I attend a concert by myself? That sounds really stupid of a question but right now that is really what is consuming my thoughts. How terrible am I?!

You see, I really want to see George Michael in concert. Like, really want to!! Why? I have no clue! Okay, I have to admit I have been a fan for the last 25 years and really didn't realize I was. Does that make sense? I remember first seeing "Wake me up before you go-go" on the Chum top 30. My brother got the Make it Big cassette as a birthday present (I got the Pointer Sisters) and I remember pretty much stealing it from him. And of course I remember the Faith album. I remember the whole thing. I remember how rebellious it was to listen to "I want your sex". Then when Listening without Prejudice came out I remember the big deal about all of the videos not including George Michael in it. And his last three albums well, I have bought the day they were released. All this and I didn't know I was a fan!

So, his most recent album "25" was released on Tuesday and I bought it via itunes. It came with 40 of his music videos. Included in these videos was one of George singing "I'm your man" at one of his recent European concert. Here's the thing....it looks damn fun! Like it would be 2 hours of dancing and singing and just good old fashioned pop music.

Here's my problem....no one will go with me. Many have said, "hey that might be fun" but clam up the moment they hear that the prices at the 100 levels at the ACC are $200. Even I admit the price is high, but here is how I am reasoning it out. My birthday is coming up soon. Instead of getting some bath stuff or something that will collect dust I was going to ask everyone for money. I would use that money to pay for the ticket. Then I would be getting one night of real fun out of my birthday. To me that just makes sense.

So, is it wrong if I just go by myself? I started thinking about any concerts I have gone to in the past and often I have ended up chatting with everyone around me. I remember in one recent concert talking to the girl sitting beside me (who did come alone) more than Joe! I think it's more the driving down there by myself that is putting me off. Am I crazy for even thinking of this?! I need feedback. I want to make a decision soon before I can't get tickets anymore.

Laundry - our little secret

2008-03-31T14:26:00.000-04:00

Okay, here's something I have noticed. Laundry is a pretty easy task. You divide dirty clothes into piles, throw a pile in the machine and walk away. You come back later to throw another pile in the machine and walk away. You sit down and fold clothes while chatting on the phone or watching tv. All easy stuff. Laundry can take all day, but really it's just because you're waiting for a machine to finish.
Here's another thing I have noticed.......Men have no idea how easy laundry is! If you say you have spent the whole day doing laundry (which isn't a lie) they think you've been working away all day! Not really. I mean, I'm writing this blog while doing laundry. Oh, wait a second.....had to throw my last load in the wash. That took all of 1 minute!
I have done other things today like tidying up the house, so it will have the illusion of clean when my darling husband walks through the door tonight. And considering I have just spent the last two day sick in bed that is pretty damn good.
Well, I should end this. I now have laundry to fold and....crap...I just remembered I have to unload the dishwasher!

tied in knots

2008-03-03T20:01:00.000-05:00

In about five days our family is going on a cruise. Whenever anyone asks me about it they always ask if I'm excited.....I will be, but not right now. Right now I am so stressed that I have a constant headache and have the ability to cry at the drop of a hat. Why? Because I am the person with the job of getting 4 people ready for this wonderful trip. I am packing for four people. I am trying to be prepared for any problems that might arise. I am getting the dog ready for staying at my mom's for the week. I am arranging doctor's appointments for two kiddies who have just now come down with a cold. I am doing all of this while still doing all the everyday things that come with life.
I'm tired. I'm not sleeping. I am stressed.
I will be fine once we all board the cruise ship and settle in. Until then.......well, wish me luck.

2008-02-26T19:09:00.000-05:00

I was actually sitting in front of my computer for an hour trying to figure out what exactly to write about. Do I write about the stress of getting 4 people ready for vacation? Do I write about the weird dream I had the other night involving Seth Rogan? Just as I was contemplating what exactly to write it was bedtime for my twins and my lovely daughter gave me a brand new subject.
Abby pulled an all out temper tantrum at bedtime. I told her it was time for bed and she hit me! One thing I will not stand for in my home is a lack of respect for elders. So, off to bed she went kicking and screaming the whole way. I told her to go pee and brush her teeth only to have her running away from me. I don't think so!!!!
In the end she was sent to bed without a story and a good yelling. I have a feeling this story ends with a "to be continued......".

Valentine's Day

2008-02-13T12:26:00.000-05:00

This will be my husband's and my 16th Valentine's day together. After 16 years I have to admit I am done with the holiday. First off, it is a holiday that only caters to women. I mean, how many pairs of red boxer shorts does a man need?! Last year I saw a girl making her boyfriend a build-a-bear. What a waste of money! Can you name me one guy who would like to get a fully outfitted teddy bear as a gift?

Second, I don't like half of the stuff that are normal gifts of Valentine's day.....I don't like jewellry, I don't like roses, and I hate lingerie!

I think if you are romantic on some of the other 365 days of the year you really don't need that one day to tell you to be romantic. Maybe I'm wrong.

So, I guess I'll take this opportunity (on February 13th) to say that I am happy to have had 16 wonderful Valentine's days with my Joseph......and if he ever shaves his beard off I'll drop him like a hot potato! tee, hee!

Winter

2008-02-11T13:03:00.000-05:00

I have discovered something about myself lately.....I like winter! I don't ski or snowboard and I hate to skate, but I really do like winter. As bad as this winter has been I don't have this desire to get away from it. And it's not like I've been hiding away in my house from it. Every other day the kids and I are walking to school and the trip to school for my two is literally uphill both ways! But I've enjoyed it.
I think what makes a big difference is that I am not commuting in the snow. When I had to commute to Toronto every day for work winter used to stress me out. To see snow on the forcast used to do me in because I knew it meant waking up an hour to fight all of the traffic.
I know there are people that hate the cold weather. That's not me. I am very much warm blooded. If anything I can get sick of the summer. I'm not into sweating. hee, hee!
And some people might say I'm only saying this because I know I have a cruise coming up in a month's time, but I assure I am really not looking forward to putting on summer clothes while I still have my "February fat". (That's a quote from "Mystery, Alaska"). I can't wait to be with my family for a while week and I can't wait for the experience of a cruise, but I could have handled it any time of the year. It didn't have to be the winter.
So, now I'm wondering if I will be playing the same tune in April when we there will still be snow falls. We will just have to see!

Part II

2008-02-10T20:53:00.000-05:00

So, we took the pictures we painted yesterday, cut them out, and made one big picture that is now displayed proudly in our kitchen. I thought I would share it with you. For anyone that knows their Beatles songs this is from "Being for the Benefit of Mr Kite".

They don't fall too far from the tree

2008-02-09T20:04:00.000-05:00

I watched Across the Universe this week....and loved it!!! It is art in every sense of the word! Plus, it takes place around my favourite time in history (the 60's).

I have been playing the soundtrack over and over again ever since. I also have to admit I have watched the movie often as well. So much so that my kids now ask for specific songs to be played. Their favourite..."the one with the blue people, Mommy".

So, I thought I'd share some of the pictures they painted tonight before dinner. They are so my kids! I am such a wannabe hippy!

Nothing on tv

2008-02-09T19:49:00.000-05:00

I think my husband is loving the writers strike. Normally I am the one who has complete control of the remote and only sometimes does Joe get to watch what he wants on the "big tv". Now that there is absolutely nothing on tv he has been watching hockey game after hockey game without even an arguement from me. At first I didn't mind so much. There were always old shows to catch up on and even some movies to watch, but now....I'm bored.
I am not a fan of reality tv. I'm not into people making complete asses out of themselves just for money or a little bit of fame. And is it just more or now that we are into season 6 or 7 of whatever reality show we seem to be scraping the barrel for talent. I guess I am just tired of the same old thing.
The news is saying that the end is sight. It can't be soon enough for me!

Feeding my right brain

2008-01-30T21:42:00.000-05:00

Today I dropped the kids off at school, went and got my haircut, spent some time at a bookstore picking up some books for a future vacation, watched "Stardust", picked up the kids from school, made them leftover pizza for dinner, sent them off to a church program and then watched "3:10 to Yuma". Now I am on the computer listening to Sara Bareilles and writing a new post on my blog. Not a bad day if you ask me.
Sure, there's laundry to fold, bathrooms to clean, dishes to wash, etc, but today I did not care. Today I was selfish.
I needed to get lost in a movie....twice. I needed to get excited over the prospect of a new book. I needed to feed that right brain that just asks for something creative. To appreciate art in every form it comes in.
Tomorrow I'll wake up to an alarm. I'll be in full-on homemaker mode with a second title of daycare provider. I'll be playing referee to either twin 4 year olds or twin 2 year olds. I'll be folding laundry. I'll be in a constant tidy-up mode.
But today..........it was all about me.........and it felt damn good!

Kindergarten

2008-01-24T19:42:00.000-05:00

My 4 year old twins are in their first year of school. They are in a school where they are with the same teacher for both JK and SK, but their teacher was on mat leave since last April and has just come back this January. So, they started September with a substitute teacher who was supposed to be with us until the Christmas break. Well, another teacher in the school (gr. 4) went on mat leave in November and this substitute teacher was offered to fill in for that mat leave starting asap. This meant we had a substitute-substitute teacher for the end of November and all of December. So, in the first 4 months of my kids' school career they have had 3 teachers!
I have a problem with this. I have a problem with the fact that I as a parent once again have to get to know yet another teacher. I can accept that this is their permanent teacher and she is trying to get the kids onto her schedule and her way of teacher, but, whether she likes it or not, this is my kids' THIRD teacher this year! They don't know her at all and neither do I.
I guess this rant all came about as I was quickly called over while picking the kids up from school on Wednesday to be told that Stewart (my son) was having some temper tantrums in school. Her definition was crying over not being picked. Now, this was a two-second conversation as I was trying to keep hold of my two kids as well as my two daycare kids (2 year old twins) at the time and I really didn't have time to talk. When I said that didn't seem like Stewart she said that Abby (my daughter) says he has done that before.
First off, why are you talking to a 4 year old about her brother's behavior?
Second, anyone who knows Stewart would be very surprised to hear that he had a temper tantrum. It's not in his nature. He is an emotional boy and I can totally see him crying over not being picked...that is something we are working on....but I consider temper tantrums to have some base in anger and that is not Stewart at all. He becomes sad. Stewart has cried the same way since he was born and that is complete and utter heartbreak. He is a loud crier and whether he is physically hurt or emotionally hurt he cries the same way.
So, I guess I am a little pissed off that in January I have to have a discussion with the teacher about my son's temperaments. This is a discussion I should have had...and I think I might have...back in October. Not now.
We'll see if I have more to write tomorrow after I get to chat with her.

sad

2008-01-23T12:22:00.000-05:00

I am sad today. Heath Ledger has died at the young age of 28. And even more sad he has left behind a little 2 year old daughter.
According to my brother I'm really not supposed to be sad. "That's what their all like. They're nothing like you see on TV. They're all just a bunch of drug addicts." How he knows this I have no clue. I think it all comes down to being a cop and being hardened by death. He just doesn't care anymore.
Me, I'm the opposite. I'm the sensitive one who, somebody once said, "looks at the world through rose coloured glasses". That may be true. All I know is I didn't see this one coming. And I don't think anyone did, as you see the sadness and shock from everyone in the entertainment world reacting to it.
Tragic and sad is all I can say about this. He might not have cured cancer or won a Nobel prize, but the world lost a talented actor yesterday....and a little girl named Matilda lost her daddy.

first entry

2008-01-20T10:57:00.000-05:00

Well, I guess everyone has a first entry and this is mine. You start a blog with a tonne of things to say, but where do you start? Do you give a background by saying where your life has been going? Or do you pretty much to start mid-sentence and do the explaining as you go along?
My usual conversation preference is to pretty much start mid-sentence, so I guess that is what I am going to do here.
First off, let me start by apologising for all spelling and grammatical errors. I may have majored in English in university and did a course on publishing, but editing was never my strong suit......but I can analyse the hell out of any piece of literature you throw my way!
I've started this mostly just to write down the inner monologue that seems to constantly be playing in my head? Am I the only one who has this? I mean, meditation is something that I just can't achieve. To stop the thoughts rushing through my head long enough to be in the moment seems impossible. There is always something to think about whether it be simple tasks of both a mother and wife or just pondering life. Seriously, how can I be expected to stay silent?
So, here I am writing things down in hopes that maybe the thoughts that keep running around my head like an intricate freeway system might slow down just a little....and maybe become more of a four lane highway.
From me to you this is a sincere "welcome".
Cole